“Honor Christ and put others first.”--Ephesians 5:21 (CEV)

This scripture tells two simple things: what to do and why to do it.

We are encouraged again and again in scripture to prefer our brethren over
ourselves. This goes against the 'wisdom' of the world, which usually
encourages a 'me-first' attitude. 'Self-esteem' and 'self-love' are the 
primary focus of many 'self-help' books.

I understand this these ideas are well-intentioned. The problem is that 
they are incomplete. Let's back up and take a look at something we all
should understand fairly well.

We are not saved by works, but by faith. This seed of faith produces fruit:
fruit in ourselves and in our actions. So we ARE doing good works, but we 
are not doing them to get saved. We are doing them as a result of our 
salvation.

So faith and works are inseparable. They are two sides of the same coin, 
much like self-esteem and submission.

Many people trapped in depression spend time and money on self-help 
books and building self-esteem and doing self-talk etc. How many of 
these people are volunteering their time in their community? How many 
of them are laying down their lives for others? How many are serving 
in their calling?

You may have noticed that, when you get involved in the church, there 
are many opportunities to help out our brethren. The more we help out 
(Jesus—the suffering SERVANT of Isaiah), the more we are VALUED. 
One day we hope to hear the Lord say to us, “Well done” (Luke 19:17). 
What is this praise and reward a result of? Being a good servant. 
Being a good servant to whom? Being a good servant to our brethren 
and to the unsaved.

The other half of this verse says “Honor Christ.” This is our motivation. 
Sometimes we really don't want to serve our brethren. But we honor 
Jesus when we do. Flip that idea around for a second: if we DON'T 
prefer our brother over ourselves, we are NOT honoring Christ. Check 
out a few other versions:

Submitting to one another in the fear of God. (NKJV)

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ. (RSV)

We are reminded in Phil. 2:2-4: “Let nothing be done through strife 
or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than 
themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also 
on the things of others.” (KJV)

Larry Richards (in The Teacher's Commentary, p. 930) comments: 
“Whatever role we have been given provides us an opportunity to serve 
our brothers and sisters in Christ. It is when we accept our role as 
husband, wife, employer, employee, community leader, or citizen in 
light of Christ's teaching and example, with a reverence for Him and 
His heavenly Father that we will begin to serve one another.”

Christians have accepted Jesus as their Lord and have submitted their 
lives and wills to Him. We have responded to his perfect love. Our 
response includes picking up our cross and following Him. What does 
that look like? It looks like us laying aside our will so that Christ 
can live through us, realizing his will through our lives.

Be encouraged! Ask Jesus for help in this, and He will be faithful!